AN INDULGENT PARODY OF PRESIDENT OBAMA

ROUND UP THE SPECULATORS

Diary entry – April 18, 2011

People are worried about gasoline prices. I’m worried too. I’m going to tell the country my concern on this issue. I’ll blame the ‘speculators’ – they’re an easy mark and it sounds so good – speculation, greed, profits. That's red meat for a Democrat. 

I’ve had several of discussions with our Energy Secretary Chu and he and I agree that we’ll continue the ‘go slow’ on drilling approvals in the Gulf of Mexico. I’ve also personally told Saudi oil interests that it’s fine by me if they want to cut back production just slightly – let them get their good price now, in thirty years we’ll all be driving solar cars and the Saudi’s won’t have anyone to buy their oil.

If we could only get gas prices to $6 a gallon people would understand the need for alternative energy. All those people clinging to their big cars, driving all over the country on long weekends. They should stay home and enjoy a family weekend.

Got to go, Michelle and I are off to London for the weekend, got a big wedding to attend.

AN INDULGENT PARODY OF PRESIDENT OBAMA

TRUMP CALLS KRAUTHAMMER

I was watching Fox News today (don’t tell my base) and heard their ultra conservative panelist, Charles Krauthammer tell the viewers he’d gotten a call from Trump. To make a long story short, Krauthammer now believes Donald Trump is a serious candidate for the presidency is 2012. My first thought was –halleluiah!  I’ve been having some doubts about my re-election, but if Trump is out campaigning he’ll be doing more good for me than Soros and the Huffington Post put together. I might even send him a donation.

Memo to myself - 10AM tomorrow - golf lesson.

OBAMA IN HAWAII - A DIARY

Christmas – 2010

I love coming to back to Hawaii, seeing my old school friends and golfing the world’s most scenic courses. I go for a swim in the morning, have breakfast, a short rest and then I’m off to a different golf course every day. What I life. Back in Washington I can’t swim in the ocean and usually wind up playing golf on the same course day after day. Golf gets my mind off the country’s problems. I need time to relax, time to think how best to use our nations resources and make meaningful investments in the future. All I need is more money. I just want to raise taxes on those that can afford to pay –you know, those earning over $250,000. God, those Republicans, you’d think I’d insulted their grandmother the way they howl. But I have a plan, I’ll give them some spending cuts (with one of those opt out letters attached) and they’ll give me my tax (investment) money to spend. God, I felt great spending that first trillion dollars on health care. When I was growing up here in Hawaii I never thought I’d get my hands on a trillion dollars. Warren Buffett called and congratulated me. I talked to Warren for about twenty minutes and he said he’d be happy to pay more in taxes. I just love Warren - and golf.

 

I thought I'd share one of my favorite golfing photos with you. Look at that swing. I take lessons once a week, I won't tell you the golfers name, but he's a legend in the sport. He flies all the way in from Scottsdale, Arizona for my lesson, what a guy. With his help I've cut two strokes off my handicap.

Got to go, time for golf.

DRONE INVASION

DRONE INVASION – CHAPTER TWO

SOMEWHERE IN TEXAS
A former vice-president has just finished a phone conversation with a Chinese Party Official contact in Beijing. The Chinese Official has called to get background on the new secret missile launch and its implications for China – US relations. The vice president assured his Chinese contact that he had no input into the decision, but as background, stressed that the spacecraft was merely a continuation of the space shuttle program and should not be considered a step toward space weaponisation.  The Chinese official called to discuss the need for the pursuit of peace, the vice-president stressed the US need for support on its Iran policy and the hope that progress could be made with North Korean negotiations. The Chinese contact thought these matters unrelated to the question of space security (unrelated to Chinese interests) and thought they had a commitment for the peaceful use of space. The vice-president thought ‘peace’ was unrelated to Chinese national interests. The conversation ended with the Chinese Official feeling he’d stressed that his national interests were utmost in maintaining good US-Sino relations. The vice - president thought, ‘Fuck him.’

 
ADANA-INCIRLIK AIRBASE, TURKEY
UNDERGROUND HANGER
There is a golf course at the northeastern corner of the airbase that extends to the west. Under the golf course exists and hanger facility one mile long and three thousand feet wide. There are five hundred  RQ-170 unmanned “Beasts of Kandahar’ about to be deployed by  pilot operators in Nevada. They will fly south over the Mediterranean, cross Israeli and Jordanian airspace, turn south again into Saudi Arabian airspace, then disappear completely.